Home is where the heart is

I think it's stupid, that your home has to be where you are born.

I mean, is home not a place where you are meant to feel most at home and most happy?

A place where you can feel safe and content. The place you heart is.

So does that mean that literally anywhere can be our home, as long as we are happy there.

And anyway, are we not all living under the same sky.? Does that not make us the same?

'Home is where the heart is'

I'm sick of people telling me 'Your already home' when i say i miss my home (Germany). Because i generally love that place more than anywhere else in the entire world, and i know when i have everything sorted and under control, i want to move out there, it's amazing and just so beautiful.

The people, the ground, the grass, i love everything, theres this thing in Germany, that i love called respect, something that England seems to lack quite greatly in more than one area. The place is just so clean.

It gives me hope there, and moves me to tears, how a total stranger will get off the bus to help someone else on, in England people just sit and watch and don't think to help.

I don't need for the sunshine to be beating down to be happy in that place, rain or shine, even in snow, nothing can take away my deep love and affection for that wonderful country.

I miss it.

I miss Germany

I miss my home

You and me....

A little poem i wrote in memory of all cancer paitents, its crap i know, but i think it holds a beautiful and conforting message...

Do not worry i am safe now,
Happy and so free,
I'm looking down upon you
sending your love and thoughts to me

I didn't want to go at first
but the pain it got too much
However do not worry
the angels look after me above.

I know the doctors could not save me,
But please do not be mad.
You see they tired their hardest
And i hate seeing you so sad.

Death is not the end
it's just a new life that's begun
One that's everlasting, internal.
Dancing under the sun.

I'm just so happy now
even though i miss you oh so much
I'm saving a space for you in heaven
When your time is up.

But for now i want you to live your life
Be happy for me.
I'll see you one day soon again
And we will live on,
under the sun

you and me
for eternity.

Love never dies..???

I was on tumblr today, and i saw a quote on my friends page saying

'It's better to have loved than not to have loved at all', it was a post she'd wrote in memory of her friend that passed away,..

I was sitting there thinking about it, and think that maybe, that quote is actually wrong, i mean in this case at least.

It's talking about love in a past tense, as if there is no love there anymore, which i think is kinda dumb, just because someone passed away does not mean love instantly has to be snatched from both sides.

I think love is one of those precious things that is always there. I mean, the real true love. Once you love someone, i don't think you can 'unlove' them, yes, if they do something bad enough, you could end up hating (strong word) them. But i really do not that the love goes away. How can you love someone, and then just not.

REAL LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL.

That means no matter what that person does, and even if you can never bring yourself to look or talk to them again, there must still be a little part of you that loves that particular person.

I think that if you can unlove someone, then you never really loved them at all.

Take me for example, i had one 'friend' that treated me like crap, one of my best friends, and i don't talk to her now, but i loved her, and i know as much as i don't want to admit it, i still do, simply because she was such a big part of my life.

Love is just so beautiful i don't think it could ever go away completely..

I wish that where there is war, there could be love instead, the world would be perfect...i mean as perfect as perfect could be.

Love love love

Love is all you need

Two white doves....

I went to my godmother and god fathers funeral today...It was beautiful, as beautiful as a funeral can get. What a lovely send off for two wonderful people.

I really didn't want to be there. It was my 19th and i wanted to be out partying, not going to a funeral then back to college all day to rehearse for we will rock you. But you know what? I was grateful for today and everything that happened.

At the end of the service this lady opened a box and got out two beautiful pure white doves...a animal in which when i die i want to be reincarnated in to...they mean so much to me, i even have a tattoo of a dove flying though a peace sign on my back, holding in its beak a stave with music and a treble clef on it....

They flew away together, staying together always, then i went to lay some flowers by where my grandad had his ashes scattered...i made the flowers into a peace sign, then i looked up and saw four beautiful doves sitting on the tree branch...

I know it means that there is such thing as peace, and that one day, this world will know what it is...

LIVE AS ONE...

R.I.P. Auntie Lin and Uncle Den... because i knew you i have been changed for good.

Heather Penhale

Ok so this blog is actually totally random and off the wall. But today a wonderful and amazing friend of mine Steven wrote on my wall for my birthday, and when we were talking we mentioned this girl called Heather.

It actually made me think way back to 2009 when she was on the Young American tour that i done.

I remember going up to her and seeing writing on her arm, thinking it was this awesome tattoo. but then when the next day she had something different, but also so amazing i was like...

????????

I asked her and she said that everyday she writes something on her arm, something beautiful. It actually really inspired me, and like a dumbass that i am, i didn't even get to know this wonderful person...i wish i had..... I don't regret..never regret, just wish i had spent time getting to know her..

But ok so this blog was REALLLLLYYYY random i just wanted to tell everyone though :)

PS: I'm only dumb enough that i just posted this blog and realised i done it without a picture...and had to do it again argh !

between a horses ears.....

'The wind of heaven is that which blows beneath a horses ears.'

This quote, more than ever sums up my life right now and most of all today, I went to the yard this morning feeling hopeless, all i wanted to do was want to cry. I'd had a really bad week and was pretty sure that this week coming will be bad too.

But i don't know, when I'm around the horses, i just feel a totally different person, i feel totally complete...

Even with the shit they do, and the mess they make, i mean champ today was awful, there was mess everywhere! I've never seen such a mess! Even in my bedroom!

I was not riding today, because of how i hurt my side, but i think that proved to me, that i don't always need to be on a horses back to be happy :)

My two favourites are Jay and Spirit and today Jess and i got Spirit and new numnah :) and last week a new pink haynet...i love her so much she looks beautiful.

Horses really are my passion, really are my dream, ( at the same time as dancing) I do not intend on ever going to a heaven without horses, because that would be my ideal of hell..the real hell would be better!

I love how they can hurt you ,and make you stink even worse than crap, but you still love them, i love how you have to look after them, but also at the same time how they return the favor, all the ever ask for is love and give it so much in return...

They really are amazing..

Thank you...for making my dreams come true. You make me believe in the presence of horsey angels :) XX

oh what a horrible year, and it's only febuary!

Once again, i have been walking around the whole day with my head in the clouds, and i was thinking, as a blog is mean to tell the world what is going on in your life, i should maybe do it more, instead of manly using this as a base to write down all my thoughts and feelings. To say that today has been messed up from the start does not even come close.

I opened the paper this morning to be greeted with a article about my god mother and god fathers death, i already knew, but i thought the funeral was going to be on the 28th, but what Joy, it is actually the 21st, my 19th birthday..,simply awesome.

I have to leave college where i'm rehearsing all day and then go back at the end of the service, i actually don't know how i am supposed to cope with that whole thing, i mean, I'm not even going to be able to have five seconds to myself after to get myself together, i need to be strong, but right now i don't know where i will get that strength from.

My best friend is with the biggest dickhead of a boyfriend you could possibly meet, he treats her like shit, and what makes it worse, is that she lets him walk all over her the entire time, it hurts me so much seeing it, because there is nothing i can really do, but i feel like there should be something i can do, after all, she is my best friend.

I just feel so alone right now, thats the good thing about writing in this blog, no one knows who i really am, so i can write to my hearts content,..i feel i have no one to talk too, and i am convinced that everyone hates me and actually wants me dead, and yes i know hate is a strong word, and i would never use it unless i felt strongly about something, and i feel strongly about the fact they all hate me. i could die and they would all be happy..

And you know what,? If that did happen, my only wish would be that when the police or whatever go though my computer, they find this blog and share it with the world.

I guess that i have so many thoughts, and maybe, just maybe they would help others...

I mean, normally its not this bad, im just haviing a really bad year of it....2011 is officially one of the worst years ever and its only February...

I need to kepe praying,,,begging..that things will get better...

jo dee messina

I've been though hell on my knees

came fface to face with the devil

and i know that its hard to believe

but it gets better

rascal flatts

Cuz when push comes to shove

you taste what your made of

you might bend till you break

cuz its all you can take

on your knees you look up the sign youve had enough

you get mad, you get strong, wipe your hands shake it off

then you stand

MUST MUST MUST try to remember this....

COME ON SELF!!!

THINK

LOVE LOVE LOVE

LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED!!!!!!!

SPREAD THE LOVE INCREASE THE PEACE

WORLD LOVE AND PEACE

Are you worth it...?

I cannot believe that i am saying this

addmitting that it's true.

I really could not live without you

I simply don't know what i do.

Your like a drug i need you

everyday i need more and more

you crush me from the inside

destory everything i stand for

It's actually quite patheitic

what with all the fucking lies

that i still believe and want you

forever in my life.

I hate you being with me

but then I'd hate more if you wernt

I love you arms around me

Even though it always hurts

Why is it always like this

I'm at war with my own heart.

I keep saying i'm better off without you

But my heart won't let us part.

One day maybeI'll wake up

and my heart then will decide

if i can or cannot live without you

and keep intact my pride....

I really do think to much...

I actually cannot understand why life is a pig sometimes..

Why when something goes wrong does everything have to go wrong at the same time...

Because even though what you go through, no matter how hard it is makes you stronger.

I actually begin to wonder sometimes if i am going to get through it and learn anything from the experience

I miss my sisters, and ok by that not 'blood' related, but i miss being around the people who make me feel so complete, the people who actually make me practice what i preach on myself, who make me actually think about myself as a person and not just a waste of space, whilst constantly looking out for the rest of the world.

They always bring me a step closer to being 'ok' with myself, but then for every step i go forward, i usually take 50 steps back and it goes on like that for what seems like forever.

I really do think sometimes that life would be better for everyone if i was just dead, i mean, life is such a beautiful and amazing thing, a gift bigger than anything else you could ever possibly wish for, but then, despite knowing this, i still get ungrateful and do thank god enough for simply 'being'...but then there are the people who are dying, dying young and even old...who appreciate life, in the way i wish i could..surely, surely they deserve to live more than me, I don't know why the circle of life has to work in such complicated and unfair ways, but it does.

I really hope one day that i can just open my eyes and be grateful to live on such a wonderful planet, to be able to feel the grass and land beneath my feet, to feel the wind in my hair, to see the trees breathing life to the world. Because i see the beauty i really really do, and it makes me want to cry because its so beautiful...but i still wish sometimes, i was anywhere but here...

Sometimes when i see the fighting on the TV and the wars, and the people chopping down their life support machines (trees)..it makes me more than ever want to be somewhere else, the world is just so full of hatred, and i'm worried that one day, it's going to increase to such a level that means it overshadows the beauty.

On the news just now five coffins were brought home from war, thats five people gone forever, and many lives and families shattered...it's not fair.. but proves my point exactly...

Oh someone help sort out my brain....i don't know what to do anymore......

This is what dreams are made of

I was looking though tumblr today and i saw this picture..

It gave me such hope, hope for everything in life that i want..

hope for peace and hope for love.

If there is one part of the world, just at least this one place, that is so amazingly peaceful and breathtakingly beautiful. does that not mean that one day the entire world..maybe, just maybe will be the same...

I know it's a dream, a slightly over the top dream but everything good thing that happens starts with a dream right, for something good to happen, someone must have wanted it, or at least dreamed about it.

I just simply love how full of everything this picture is, SO MUCH could be going on here and you just cannot know.

Here someone could be laughing, crying, praying, dancing, sleeping..ANYTHING....this picture just holds so much...

I love just how clean the sand is, and beautiful and clean the ocean is...it's hard to believe, in other parts of the world people are dying every five minutes due to poor or dirty conditions. It makes me sad, that they will never ever get to experience this, to experience the beauty that this planet has...

I don't understand why the whole world cannot just share, there is enough on this earth for everyone to live a comfortable life, it just seems, that some people seem to live a life of luxury, whilst others are struggling to survive..

It shouldn't be about what you have but who you have..to spend time with nature..ok so there might not be a beach like this near where you live, but i bet there is somewhere equally as beautiful...and you know...you should enjoy and embrace it, and maybe give a little of the extras to the ones who need it more.

Help for the heroes

Ok, so I've been thinking about it,

It really really is time that people started to realise exactly what our heroes do for us, and actually give time to thank them.

There is this amazing charity called help the heroes, and last night i was just reading on there some of the things these poor soldiers have to go though, even if they do not lose their life, quite a few are left with a disability, and sometimes even loose limbs. That's not even adding into the mix the emotional and mental trauma they suffer.

So think about it, while you are sitting at home, drinking tea, reading a newspaper of watching TV, please just take time to think about the people out there on the front line, battling for your freedom, for you to be able to live and sit and do exactly what you do.

I'm not saying you dont have a right to do what you want to do, but i'm saying you should give thought the other men and woman out there. Say a prayer and light a candle for them, and if you have some money left over at the end of the week instead of wasting it, how about giving it to the charity..

Buy a h4h band...or there are other things you can by on there site..think about it. the money goes to an extremely good cause and not to mention the publicity the charity will get..

I wear my help the heroes band with pride and you should to..

Peace out x

Where did it go wrong?

Tell me where did we go wrong?
What changed.?
What the fuck did i do, to make it all go like this.
I hate not having you in my life.
And what makes it worse is that we used to be SO tight and could tell each other anything..
To say best friend, cannot even begin to come close to what we were like
i hate it...

my daddy up above..

Daddy i don't understand, i am only three, mummy said you went away to join in the army. She said you was a brave man, and that she was so proud, she said you always made a difference and stood out from the crowd.

She said there were some bad men and they had been very bad, made alot of people fight and made them very sad, that daddy was a soldier, and he stood for peace and love, that he had gone to make these bad men, be friends again and hug.

But then one day mummy was crying i asked her what was wrong, she said ' baby daddy is not coming home now' I wondered what i had done wrong.

She said you'd gone to live with the angels, way high up in the sky above, and that i was not to worry you were surrounded with so much love.

I asked mummy if one day, if i could come visit you with the angels and play, but she said that daddy, you were to far away, and i couldn't get there to play not even by a plane.

I cried a little for you but wiped the tears from my eyes, i needed to be strong for mummy, a night i heard her cries.

We miss you daddy, like alot, really alot! I wish you would come home now, i don't like the word 'gone'. Mummy said it was ok, if i wanted to cry, she said that it was normal, but i don't like to cry.

If you could come home now, then we can run and play, mummy would be happy and me too in every way!

But for now i say a prayer for you before i close my eyes.. pray that you are ok, and happy in the sky..

until the day i see you again, i miss you daddy just so much..

I really really love you..my daddy up above...

Ok, so this is pretty crap, but i wrote it just now, i was watch a tv thing about war, and there was this little girl, who was three years old, she lost her dad in the war.just for a second i tried to put myself in her shoes and imagine what it would be like to have and lose someone you love in the army, and i wrote this..

I don't know, i guess that i'm trying to get across the point of what the war and fighting can do to everyone, it really does affect the entire world

give peace and chance

this should not have to happen as often as it does

war is over...but like john lennon said, only if you want it..

PS: The intention of this is to move you, that, is the only way sometimes to get a message across..but you know what...

if this did move you then i want to thank you, you have a heart and a soul, there is hope for this world.

A little bit of peace...

All i really want is a little bit of world peace..

It's not much to ask really is it...?

Sometimes i am ashamed to live on a planet like this.

I just cannot understand why the world is so full of hatred for other people..?

Why can the world not just live as one.?

GIVE PEACE A CHANCE... thats all i'm sayin really...

And it's all i think about...

It's something i want more than my own life...

urgh, I'm off to hug a tree....

Why can't i just be who i want to be?

I wish i could listen to my heart.
I wish i could take what i say to other people
and mean it for myself with all the PASSION AND LOVE i have for others..
I hate when i have down days, and every bit of logical thiniking goes out fo the window,
and i'm left with my own thoughts of what i feel people think of me.
Why the fuck can i just not take my own advice?
I can say it to others and fully believe in what i am saying..i DO believe in it, everything does happen for a reason and there is always hope...i want everyone to be equal and happy...and i , really want it for whoever it may be..
But when it comes to myself i can't see it..when i'm upset, the whole concept of the sun will rise again goes out the window and i just wanna lay there and cry my eyes out.
I can say..the whole world and everyone in it is beautiful..
but yet i think/know i am the most ugliset person in the universe.
I could slap myself sometimes.
I actually could...
One day...one day...I'll be the person who i help everyone else to be...

Thinking....

Ok so i figured out, that i really do have some wonderful friendships in my life. and i mean ok, some people really don't give a fuck, and they never will, and as if i will ever be able to do anything about that and change it.. It's not gonna happen.

But those very rare people who i CAN call my real friends, are they, or are they not, the best thing that could ever possibly happen to my life. ?

And you know what i also figured out..?

It's the friends who i don't constantly talk to, and the ones in which i sometimes hardly ever see, that are the most loyal and trustworthy, and there for me when i need them...

It's not the ones that go 'oh your my best friend' even though it's clearly not true...

It's not the ones thats completely ignore me until they want to find something out or get something off me...

It's the ones who remind me, every now and then that they will always be there for me.

It's the ones who sometimes just have to give me a hug or say 'i love you' for me to feel better..

It's the ones that say, i will do everything i can to help and understand you..and not the ones that say 'i totally understand' when they don't.

Sometimes it's the people you have never met in person...but when you do meet, you realise your like twins...so amazingly alike..but so beautifully different at the same time...

I don't want to lose those people, the day they go I'm gone too...but i really should start getting rid of those unhelpful idiots who pull me down the entire time..

Oh well...I'm grateful for who i have, and thats all that matters.. :)

I wanna fly away

I'm really falling oh so apart and i don't know whats wrong...

I'm emotional, sad and feel like i have the entire universe upon my shoulders.

I feel even more guilty because i know there are people worse off than me out there..people who deserve help..people so alone who have no one...yet still i am selfish...and cry..

I sometimes wish i was not here and i was not alive, then i couldn't ruin anyone Else's life, and i could be an angel, speaking words of love and wisdom to those who need it.

Not sitting being a waste of space like i currently am.

I just want to get away from it all..it's just getting a little bit too much for me to handle right now. I just need a few days out to chill and look at things from a different angle..but i don't even have five seconds spare to myself to do that in...

Sometimes i wonder why i am so selfish, and thinking about myself...but at the same time i wish i could be honest with people and tell them how i am feeling and when i am really not ok...saying i am fine all the time is a downright lie..thats not fair on anyone now is it?

I think i'll go have a little singer songwriter session,,get it out...

But if anyone finds the remote to life let me know.? Istill wanna get off for a bit...

I've heard it said

Oh wow, so i was just randomly listening to music on you tube and stumbled across a video of 'for good' i was watching the emotion and heart going into the characters and broke down a little...

I realised how many people i have in my life that have changed me for the better....and i also cried, because i was sad i hardly knew them anymore, at least the majority of them.

I wanted to write them a blog to just say how amazingly grateful i am...

It's the little things that have changed me...all the little ones...but for now i want to dedicate this, to the small few who REALLY did change me...

'It may well be

that we will never meet again

In this lifetime

So let me day before we part

So much of me,

Is made of what I've learned from you

and you'll be with me

Like a hand print on my heart'

Rosh: Oh my gosh chica, you made me see life in a totally different way to what i used to view it, and i am so blessed to have known you for the past 4/5 years. Thank you for everything and you everlasting beauty and sou...you taught me to see the good in people that the world had given up on. You taught me different ways to look at things, a way to look, that is more positive and understanding, i cannot thank you enough for that, it means so much to me, like really..:)

Emma: Because you are like my sister, from the second i met you we clicked and i can honestly say i think i would be dead right now if it was not for you, i pretty much could tell you anything and you would be there, even if you were busy, i dont think you ever judged me either and thats the beauty of it...it makes you even more special...you have a wonderful heart and i dont think i would ever want that to change.

Charlotte: Because you like the other half of me!! I adore you to little pieces i love how you stand upp for what you believe in, for example HOW HARD you work to keep ben's memory alive and to raise awareness of knife crime...it's magical what you do it really is. i love how the little things no matter how silly have a huge significance to you...just becuase of the person who gave them or the memory behind it, that is amazing..please never ever change anything about your self or who you are, you already as perfect as you could possibly be...

Ericka: Omgosh, your like a little mini Roshni! Your totally amazing...!! You have such a beautiful soul and heart, and what makes me cry and brings me to tears is the fact that you are still so young, i have never seen someone that young be SO BEAUTIFUL in the way you are. I love how we have so much in common...it's just awesome...and i cannot wait till the day i FINALLY get to do a workshop with you :)

Sarah R: Your smile your smile your smile!!! It lights up my heart and my life, and you always make me feel better about myself, i love everything about you. i love how you are so amazingly beautiful and yet you still talk to me!!!! i love how you are SO POPULAR and make time for me, i don't understand why you would do that. Again never ever change, everyone adores you the way you are...

Sarah B: I LOVVVVVVVVVVEEEEEEEEEEEEE YOU...you really are one of my best friends you are always there for me, even when im having some major boy crisis problem, or evn something more stupid than that! I love your bluntness.... 'VIKKIE what the hell are you bloody thinking love you can do SO mcuh better' thank thank thank thank you :) Xx

Sarah C: ANOTHER Sarah but also another best friend of mine, You give me a reason to get up sunday mornings when i would rather stay in bed, because i know when i get down the yard we can have a good old chat and giggle....and normally a good bitching session to..: ) You understand me....your amazing ...

Jenna: MY TWIN, MY OTHER HALF, MY SISTER...i'm not even going to write anything, ebcause i simply cannot put it into words.....ok :)

and everyone else...

Wiana,Steven,ALL the young Americans,my college friends (spesh Ellie) Sophie, Daisy, Ellen...Spazzums, OMG THERE ARE JUST SO MANY!!! :)

Liebe

Learning to dance in the rain

I wish sometimes that my life was like a DVD..

Something i could observe from a distance, something i could rewind, pause or fast forward...or even better i could eject, throw away and put a new one in the player.

But then life is not like that, there are hard times...and i guess they do make you stronger, it's about learning to get through them, one step at a time.

There are times when i wonder why i bother...and what the point is in carrying on, like seriously...why the fuck if something is going to go wrong, does it have to do it all in one go. Life is actually a total arsehole, and it will screw you over more times than the biggest player ever will, more than anybody you could possibly meet.

No one dies a virgin, life really does screw us all.

I wish it was easy to just accept the fact, move on from it and it will be ok, but really, life just does not happen that way.

It's learning to dance though it, and live..just LIVE...and sometimes i need reminding of that...which is why i'm writing it as a blog, to read back on.

Even if you feel you cannot help yourself, then isn't it better to reach though the darkness and help someone else...just till you feel ok again?

I mean thats only a thought...but i think it's a good one right?

There is always hope

I have a poster next to my bed. My friend sent it to me for Christmas..

It's a photo of a girl holding a heart balloon...and behind her lie the words

'THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE'

It gives me hope..always...theres always a little part of me, no matter how bad life gets, that holds on to meaning and significance of the words on this poster...

It gives me a little room to breathe when i feel like i'm being crushed under all the stuff thats going on in my life...HOPE....I love that word don't you? There's so much beauty inside a word which PROVES beyond a doubt, that no matter what, things will be ok...and you know what..i think...they really will..because i do have hope...

I'm not that stupid and i know, i know that everything will not happen overnight..one step at a time is all it really is if you think about it. Don't be a quitter..quitters get nowhere, and please don't be afraid of failure..you only fail when you don't try...and remember whenever you think it's hopeless to even bother trying...

THAT THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE...

There really is a point in everything, no matter how insignificant...

I once read a story about a young girl who committed suicide..her note read..

'I'm going to jump off the bridge..i can't this anymore, but, if just one person smiles at me as i'm walking there, then i will turn around and come home, get help and live again...'

She ended up jumping...ok so i know thats not a good thing to put here...but...think about it...she only wanted a smile...JUST ONE SMILE...so smile at a stranger...yes it may seem insignificant but look at the difference it made...she gave up on hope...and one person just ONE person could have made that change...to think she even got to the stage where she felt there was no hope breaks my heart

HOPE HOPE HOPE HOPE HOPE

Have it for yourself and in return others will have it too....If you see someone falling apart and crying don't walk past, ask them if there is anyway you can help...

Tell them to listen to their heart..and hope is whispering...keep trying...

Missing....

I hate that feeling when you miss someone...

The feeling when, you feel there is no where you would rather be than with that person.

A person who helped shape who you are today, who guided your way so often when your world was full of darkness..

A person who is like a mother, sister and friend all in one.

And the beauty of it is..you know for a fact that are like that with EVERYONE else too...

You know their heart, and the full beauty and truth within it.

It hurts you own heart, in knowing you are thousands of miles away from them, and most likely will be for a long time to come..maybe even for the rest of the time you are living..

They are amazing,simply amazing,the kind of person of whom make you believe in the presence of angels...i think, i can honestly say, there is only three people i can think of...who are too good to be human...

I wish more than ever i could be near this person, and just to hear the beautiful voice and words of wisdom.....and to see them smile...and get a whole room full of smiles in return...to see them dance...with such conviction and such PASSION...it makes you believe that dance really is the cure to everything.

I wish i wish i wish..and i wish there were more people in the world like her..it really would be a better place..

A Sarah make they whole world smile and have passion leader...and a Roshni world peace and inspiration leader and maybe a little Wiana helping Roshni with her own added dose of total CRAZYNESSS.... hmmm that seems a perfect world to me... as long as there were horses..

But right now...i miss Sarah more than anything else, more than i have missed someone in a long long while. I miss how when she is in the room, the whole atmosphere changes, its just so much lighter and brighter..

I love her to the end of the earth...I AM SO SO SO SO SO LUCKY TO HAVE HAD HER IN MY LIFE.....

although it sucks..that i'm too scared to send it to the person it's about...

x