So when i was in school i went to school with this awesome guy called Joe... The other month i was sitting in my living room actually getting ready to go up to bed when i got a message from one of my friends telling me that Joe had died. I don't want to go into details of what happened and how he died because thats not for me to say on here..but what i can say..is that the second i heard...i felt my heart breaking..literally falling into little pieces. My first thought was hatred towards myself. Joe and I hung out together in the same group for five years...FIVE years...and they actually happened to be five of my hardest years, yet in all that time i never got to really know him...i never got to speak to him like i felt i should have done.....We hung out all together and he was forever making me laugh and feel better... he made everyone smile..he was such an amazing down to earth guy. Yes Joe was a friend of mine at school... but i would never ever say we were best friends...My second thought led me onto this blog that i'm writing now... I want to ask you all a question...and i don't want written answers..i want you to ask this to yourself. Think about all the people that you have ever met/become friends with in your life...and ii don't care if it was for a minute or a hundred years think about it. Imagine you just didn't talk to them as much as you should because you 'don't have time' or 'can't be bothered'. Well what would you do if you woke up one day to the news they were no longer on this earth? Because there is no second chance to tell them how you feel. I made a stupid mistake of deleting nearly all my old school friends last year just because i didn't talk to them...i regret that now and i know 'forget regret or life is yours to miss' but its a thing that deep you can help but think about what could have happened different. To be 100% i think i must have spoken to Joe about twice after we left school and that was just over Facebook...never in that time did i say how i loved him, how i valued him, how i was thankful for his friendship. Why should I? His young, healthy... not a best friend of mine so why do i need to go telling him all that stuff...well now i know why...because you never know...NEVER know, where the circle of life will take you. The thing that made me smile and also broke me inside was a few days after I had heard this news...and a group of us were meeting up in Romford to have a drink in memory of Joe...and you know....people walked in that door that i had not seen in four or so years...people who only had a connection to Joe via the took science with him, or said hi when passing in the halls. Peoples lives whom he had touched...it was just...AMAZING to see how many people turned up. We all passed a book around and wrote something in it. I think that...was the hardest part..the 'i need to try and say an actual goodbye'...
What i want to say from this is that i don't want his death to be in vain.. PLEASE.. he was only 19...you NEVER EVER know what is going to happen and when it is going to on....take this message and lock it in your heart........got it? good. Now go tell the people that you love that you love and care for them...before its to late before your left with regrets...DO NOT take their presence for granted.
Thank you.
(This blog is in loving memory of my wonderful friend Joe Shaw..Rest in peace buddy..enjoy the free beers!!!)
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