Those three words.

'Those three words, are said too much, but not enough'

I LOVE YOU

I just wanted to write a blog about something that has really been bothering me for quite a while, and something that, no matter how much i may moan about it, will not change. I am fed up of people throwing 'I love you' around and using it in the wrong context. It's wrong to say i love you to someone when you don't, and equally it is wrong to not say i love you to someone when you do. Love is strong....REAL love is amazing..and i'm not talking about 'the one'..I'm talking about love in anything, friendship, adventure,dreams,stories,hobbies...literally ANYTHING. It makes me sad that people think love is an awful thing. I keep saying it and i will say it again, that LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED. It's sad when people feel they cannot agree with that, just because the love word was thrown around to much at some point in their life.

I have a tattoo around my wrist reading 'amor vincit omnia' which translates to love conquers all..and I've had people tell me its a stupid tattoo to get. Ok, well first of all, who the hell are you to judge me..? I clearly got this tattoo for a reason, and it must have meant something, im not one of these people to just get a tattoo for the fun of it. Secondly, it's a very true and meaningful quote. I'm normally get told things like, 'my boyfriend/girlfriend/friend told me they loved me and were always there so i told them about '.....................' ' and then they left me alone to deal with it and told the world. Well I've had that done to me before, and its what i mean by saying i love you is thrown around to much...If someone loved you, clearly they would have no intention whatsoever of spreading something so personal around for everyone to hear. They would also not leave you and try to support you as much as they can. Sometimes, sometimes it's not possible for them to support you like you would like for them to...but it does not mean they don't care, just that what you are going though they cannot understand...i personally feel that its much better to say to someone 'look i dont know how i can help ive never been there to understand but i will be there if you need a shoulder to cry on' than to say 'oh i totally understand what your going though' when clearly you don't..pretending to understand normally makes the situation worse. honesty is best. :)

What I'm trying to say is that you should look for the REAL love in your life, the people you have known forever, who have always been there for you, the ones that even when you have no make up on and a massive spot on your face will still say. 'I love you and your beautiful' and the things you enjoy to such an extreme that you simply cannot be unhappy when doing it, for example for me that would be dancing or horse riding (note frustrated does not count as hating something, because if your still carrying on at it you must love it!)

LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE LOVE

Real love is amazing, i made it my new years resolution to only say i love you when i mean it, and you know that so far i'm doing well...There are people i never said i love you to because i was too scared...I told them i loved them and in some cases i made their day... On the other hand, i know there are many people i have juse been saying i love you to for the sake of it..if i'm not sure, I simply don't say it to them anymore. There are many forms of love though, i have love for everybody and every living thing on this planet, In this resolution i was just talking about friendship love etc...

I don't know i mean, it's just a thought and i'm not making no body change their ways, that not what my intention is, I'm just saying think before you say those three small words. I love you is eight letters long but so is bullshit, make sure you mean it before you say it :)

Thank you for reading this long (slightly OTT blog)

LOVE xxxxxxx

My Guitar and I......

A few days ago, i finally realised that having my nails done, no MATTER how beautiful they looked, and regardless of them being the only thing pretty about me, is nothing compared to being able to hold a beautiful instrument in my arms and play my life away. With everything else i have ever played nails have never posed as a problem, because they simply did not get in the way for me, however, i went four years without playing my guitar...I got to this stage where my heart longed so much to hear it's melodies, that cutting my nails off seemed unimportant.

It was so odd at first and i couldn't do anything, after being used to having these extensions attached to my fingers, i pretty much didn't know what to do. So the first thing i done, was pick up my guitar. It shocked me, that i had let it get so out of tune, it was crazy! A simple strum sounded awful!! After tuning it up, i tried playing some basic chords, and what pissed me off the the max was the fact that i couldn't remember hardly anything.! Then when i did look up the chords i could not change between them well enough to save my life. This made me want to cry, and yes that is pretty silly, but still music is the brink of my life and soul, and i used to be able to play pretty well, so to go to what i am now is awful. I always thought that once you learnt something you never forgot it...? Well clearly in my case i can...i'm starting to pick it up again, but i'm just struggling so much, its so hard..i wish i had never stopped....I want to be at the stage again where i can write my own music, and express my heart though lyrics and song. Oh well, i'll keep on at it i guess, i've done it before, so there is no point in giving up this time and quitting is there? I actually don't know right now.

Fragile

Last night i went out on a nature walk with my friend, we got some REALLY amazing photos, i decided i would climb a tree and take a picture of the horses in the sunset, at the time it was a really good idea, but my foot slipped and i fell. It was so scary, i can't remember a thing of it, i remember feeling myself fall and that was it, i know that only now am i starting to remember that evening at all, and thats with looking though pictures...It's still hazy though.

I know, it made me grateful though, it made me realise how precious and yet fragile life is, i am so so lucky so lucky, yes I'm agony, but i've come out of it with bruising and severe whiplash, i was in a neck brace and on a spinal board for hours until they gave me a scan, they really thought i had done some serious damage, I'm lucky, in fact, lucky does not even come close....

I can't dance for two weeks though, i don't understand what i am going to do with myself, dancing is my life, and to think i'm going to have to abstain from it..makes me feel like im suffocating, and no horse riding or exercise for two weeks, that don't help either.

But i dont know, it made me think about all the people that lose their lives young, and how they did not deserve it. I'm lucky, and i need to start being more grateful.

(above is the picture that nearly cost my life)

Home is where the heart is

I think it's stupid, that your home has to be where you are born.

I mean, is home not a place where you are meant to feel most at home and most happy?

A place where you can feel safe and content. The place you heart is.

So does that mean that literally anywhere can be our home, as long as we are happy there.

And anyway, are we not all living under the same sky.? Does that not make us the same?

'Home is where the heart is'

I'm sick of people telling me 'Your already home' when i say i miss my home (Germany). Because i generally love that place more than anywhere else in the entire world, and i know when i have everything sorted and under control, i want to move out there, it's amazing and just so beautiful.

The people, the ground, the grass, i love everything, theres this thing in Germany, that i love called respect, something that England seems to lack quite greatly in more than one area. The place is just so clean.

It gives me hope there, and moves me to tears, how a total stranger will get off the bus to help someone else on, in England people just sit and watch and don't think to help.

I don't need for the sunshine to be beating down to be happy in that place, rain or shine, even in snow, nothing can take away my deep love and affection for that wonderful country.

I miss it.

I miss Germany

I miss my home

Love never dies..???

I was on tumblr today, and i saw a quote on my friends page saying

'It's better to have loved than not to have loved at all', it was a post she'd wrote in memory of her friend that passed away,..

I was sitting there thinking about it, and think that maybe, that quote is actually wrong, i mean in this case at least.

It's talking about love in a past tense, as if there is no love there anymore, which i think is kinda dumb, just because someone passed away does not mean love instantly has to be snatched from both sides.

I think love is one of those precious things that is always there. I mean, the real true love. Once you love someone, i don't think you can 'unlove' them, yes, if they do something bad enough, you could end up hating (strong word) them. But i really do not that the love goes away. How can you love someone, and then just not.

REAL LOVE IS UNCONDITIONAL.

That means no matter what that person does, and even if you can never bring yourself to look or talk to them again, there must still be a little part of you that loves that particular person.

I think that if you can unlove someone, then you never really loved them at all.

Take me for example, i had one 'friend' that treated me like crap, one of my best friends, and i don't talk to her now, but i loved her, and i know as much as i don't want to admit it, i still do, simply because she was such a big part of my life.

Love is just so beautiful i don't think it could ever go away completely..

I wish that where there is war, there could be love instead, the world would be perfect...i mean as perfect as perfect could be.

Love love love

Love is all you need